Tuesday, December 29, 2009

4 Days before Christmas

Last year, 4 days before Christmas I had our 3rd miscarriage. This year, 4 days before Christmas I had our 5th. It was another very early loss, which (in a way) makes it easier b/c I don't need medical care. My specialist and I have been in touch and she is studying my case in depth to find a cause...or something we've overlooked. I'm grateful for her time and attention to this.

Mike and I want nothing more than a big family, but we know it's possible we might not have any more children. When I desire nothing more than to have another baby, you can imagine these losses run deep. I have started to pray that God takes my desire for more children away.

If I can't have what I want so badly, then I don't want to have it. It hurts too much.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

I'm so sorry to read this Sarah. Prayer for peace that passes all understanding.

Jenny

Anonymous said...

Sarah,
I am so sorry to hear of your loss. I cannot imagine what you are going through. I will continue to pray for an answer to this, and for the healing of your hearts. Blessings to you, mike and natalie, from Rob and I.
love ya
~Jen